22 July 2010

The Worst Two Months of My LIFE!!!

I have a friend, Coreen, who has six children.  She is amazing to me for so many reasons.  She is an incredible mother, a devoted friend, a spiritual giant and an inspiration.  Due to the wonderful housing market in the US right now, her husband has been finishing his residency in Pontiac, Mi. for the last 10 months, and she has been living with their 6 children in Tennessee.  I've always thought she was amazing, but having just spent the last two months with Jared in Spokane and me on my own in Calgary, I am in complete awe of her.  Honestly.  I am so sick of being a single mom, and can't wait until Jared is back with me. I can't imagine how single mothers survive day after day, week after week, month after month, and for some, year after year!  I see why Heavenly Father created us to procreate in pairs, because doing it alone is really, really hard (the raising the creations, not the procreating itself- although that would be really hard too.)

The past two months has given me a lot of time to consider just why I am so lucky to have Jared in my life, and why I love him so much.  So, here's to him:

It started a long time ago, before the idea of kids even crossed my mind. I thought you were crazy, and funny, and kind of liked you. We dated.  I was right, you were crazy and funny, and not ready for commitment, so I dumped you, and then I realized I loved you.

So, you said you wanted to get serious, move to Kelowna, and asked if I would come with you, as your wife.  Then you decided that Kelowna wasn't for you, and dropping out of university wasn't the best idea.  You stood faithfully by me through our crazy 3 month engagement with all the emotion involved there.  You supported me wholly through the worst teaching year ever when I worked for the crazy feminist, and we made it wonderfully through our first year.

When we decided to multiply you came to every one of my prenatals.  You supported my decision to hire midwives, even though they were expensive, and have a homebirth, even though it was so strange to you, knowing that although I was having our baby, it was my body and my experience, and so you researched and learned, and you were there when it all fell to pieces and I needed you most. 

You didn't want to leave Calgary, but you knew it's what you needed to do to "pay for the family" so you packed up the house and drove across the continent.  You suffered through 3 years of Law School. You spent countless nights reading, typing, studying.  You worked harder than you've ever worked before to finish school.

You have trusted your instincts, and mine, as we have learned how to parent.  You have embraced the gentle parenting approach that we try to live by.  When I bring information to you about health or parenting, you strive to understand it and then wholeheartedly go for it.  You are my biggest supporter when it comes to some of the things I do that others don't understand.

When we made another baby, you drove me to all my prenatals across the border, you again understood my desire for an empowered birth, and so you supported me in hiring midwives again, which was still expensive, and have a "hotelbirth," as we had no home.  And again, when plans changed, you were there to hold me up when everything around me was falling down.

You have used the power of the Priesthood, which you are worthy to hold, to bless me and our sons countless times.  You read the scriptures to them and teach them how to pray.  You show them how to be a good man and a wonderful father.

You continue to work hard, knowing that the adventure isn't quite over.  You are willing to live alone for two months to study for the hardest test yet.  You call me every night to tell me you love me and wish you were here.  You say prayers with Eli over the phone, and tell him you love him too. 

I love you so much. I am so glad that you stole me away from that boy.  I love that you love me, and can't wait to be with you again!


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